When Love Hurts—and How MenTOR Can Prevent the Next Tragedy
This summer, British Columbia experienced a painful reminder of our desperate need for new, effective interventions. In the span of eight days, three women were killed in the context of intimate partner violence (IPV). First, a suspected murder-suicide involving a couple in Abbotsford. Then, a Kelowna woman was allegedly killed by her ex-husband. Finally, in Surrey, a woman was murdered by her intimate partner, who was then fatally shot by police.
Advocates are urging authorities to treat these incidents with the severity they deserve. They aren’t isolated “domestic disputes” but an alarming pattern of gender-based violence. Current solutions, such as emergency shelters and crisis lines, aren’t enough. IPV needs prevention at the source.
When Love Hurts: Addressing the Aftermath
Since its inception, When Love Hurts has offered sanctuary and healing to women escaping abuse. It helps victims process the aftermath—fear, trauma, safety planning, and emotional support. But it’s reactive. It doesn’t stop men from harming women in the first place.
What if we offered a solution that could?
Enter MenTOR: Prevention & Accountability
Research and statistics show that men are overwhelmingly the perpetrators of IPV. This fall, Step Forward is preparing to launch MenTOR, a program designed to address the mental health and related issues that lead men to violence against their intimate partners. It will not only heal but also prevent, working with men to address harmful attitudes, recognise patterns of controlling behaviour, and cultivate empathy and respect. It’s far more effective to interrupt an unhealthy trajectory early, rather than respond to the ensuing tragedy. That’s precisely what MenTOR aims to do.
MenTOR's revamped model includes:
Trauma-informed group sessions and a supportive environment
Practical education on emotional regulation, respectful relationships, and healthy masculinity
Professional guidance for men at risk of harmful behaviour
Affordable prices for participants
This complements When Love Hurts by addressing both sides of the crisis, supporting survivors and addressing potential harm before it escalates.
Preventing the Next Headline
Every man MenTOR reaches is:
One less headline reading, “Woman killed by intimate partner”
One less man in prison, or worse
One more healthy relationship in our community
MenTOR is an opportunity to interrupt the cycle before it leads to loss of life, and we need your help to launch the program successfully.
By donating today, you enable affordable professional support that helps us address both sides of the IPV crisis. You address the after through When Love Hurts, providing survivors with safety, healing, and support. And you address the before, preventing harm through MenTOR’s education, accountability, and intervention.
💚Help Step Forward create a future where fewer women suffer the ultimate cost of intimate partner violence—and fewer men reach the point of no return.